Skip to main content

Alone.

Alone?
Such things we call as being physically left behind
maybe by people, or events.
I think life has a cruel but sweet intention for us.
It surprises us by making the beginning as hardest part to
go through.
You'll feel as if life is being a bitch, but actually,
It's a lesson and teacher at the same time.
God also give us HINT.
That He never LEAVES us feeling lonely.
It had come upon my attention that
GOD is really NICE, because
He Listens, and Feels our sorrow,pain,
Joy and Pleasure.
I tell you.
I was crying alone, but suddenly
my best friend sent me a chat message.
I wasn't expecting, but this is a sign that Allah
knows we want someone dear to us or 
those people who we missed so much to contact us.
I never lose faith in Allah.
He has a big plan for me.
That's why all of us are tested in an unexpected ways
and time.
I would rather shorten my lifespan and be useful to other human beings
than living in sins.
I am scared of hellfire. Of course.
I'm a sinner, but I am trying my best to have a Husnul Khatimah or
we called it "Happy Ending" in Dunyya..
I want my Afterlife is as good as my dad
and those who passed away before me.
I want Allah to grant me a "Jodoh" who would know how much
pain I kept inside trying to be the best person who I can be,
I need him to be near me.
Yes, I envy those who are married, as legal couple and no more
living in sins.
I want in 6 or 8 years from now, to get married with a guy 
that I found to be interesting and will complete the other half of me.
I hope he's already near.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

#2.8 Forth letter

Hi again, My life partner and soulmate, Ikhwan Faiz, ❤️ This is the 4th letter from me to you, sayang. I know all of my letters are reflecting on my dreams and spirituality that I wanted to share with you. So that it will be relevant anytime you read this if you feel uninspired, sad or wanted to be reminded of my love to you. Maybe when our kids grow up, you can share my letters to them and talk about how you feel every time you read it. I know I'm very far-sighted and visionary, but I only wanted you to have the best optimism about everything in Life, together with me. I want to share everything I felt deeply inside with you, and no one else but God. All of my private thoughts and unspoken words.  That's a privilege held by soulmate. He is very special to me.  What's more better than having a good husband, loving children, peaceful life and having a job that you enjoy doing while making a difference in this world? Nothing. To me, my husband and my family will be most treas...
1 comment
Read more

Buried:The Melancholia episodes

" We need to catch up. Seriously. " " Last time we talked is two years ago " " I hope you're doing well now. Better than last time" " You didn't come to my wedding or response to my invitation.I knew something must've came up ." " How's life? Are you still dating that asshole that I told you to leave?He's only using you, on and off." " I hate hearing you crying or suffer. You're very smart, talented, pretty, nice and funny girl. So much to live for. " " Have you done anything stupid again, Moon? I know you're crazy and fucked up inside for many reasons " Those are some of conversation starters from my close friends that reeks my heart. Reconnections of deep thoughts and intentions from a few that knows me too well. Yes. In these few weeks, my old crushes, acquaintance, exes, good friends, and "almost a thing phase", they decided to reconnect me back into their Life, ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Not-so-Narcissist-ME

Of Relationship and its epiphany .  I've been thinking on my stance about it and on how I perceived it from my teenage years. Since I started high school and socialize around after college, I get brutally honest confessions, messages or text from people from time to time. I didn't have to ask much to let them exchange their number or social media account. I got tons of contacts in my phone from social media account, mainly because I enjoyed chatting and being empathic towards others. I spent countless of hours talking and gagging if I'm lonely and needed company. I never have to ask or beg for attention. Thus, whenever I'm in a serious relationship, my partner is always insecure or possessive, he will know each and every friends or recognise "potential threat" that he has in order to gain my attention and question my loyalty. I find it obnoxiously nauseating and mentally stalling . I enjoyed freedom, trust and mutual respect from others especially from m...
Post a Comment
Read more