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Under Pressure

What the hell?
Yes,I'm under pressure that I want to bang
my head against the wall and laugh.=.="
Yes,being a geek all of a sudden b'coz of doing CSC 232 mini project!
Hell praise to me because I took a lot of time to reconstruct and repolish
my coding skills.I used to make flash and simple.swf files.
yeah.Once,I was up to be a professional video games developer.
and right now,I have to pursue my job as stated as my faculty's name.
"Faculty of Administrative Science and Policy Study"
Well.I intended to be go to MMU and make a foundation in Computer Science.
but,all of a sudden my parents had brainwashed me,
So,I become a Public Admin Student.
and now I am going to be a debater for my university.
I can't wait to enter Yayasan Sarawak World Style English Debate Trophy 2010.
It's this upcoming Wednesday,6th October 2010 at UNIMAS.
[Banggalah sidak Unimas jadi tuai rumah]
The time for me to prove to people that I'm not useless and helpless.
Talking about under pressure,
How well does duality can help me?
I tell you.We can change our mood ANYTIME or simply walk away from the tensed
situation.After awhile,we'll continue what we are doing if we feel like it,
depends on the circumstances.
My CSC courseware project is at 50% and I'm so,so..
very fed up doing it..
I wish my friend that I delegated her work
was here,right nowand help me doing all the clicking,
and I will do the coding.
And yeah,I feel so ridiculously guilty coz I can't attend debate clinic.
Stupid CSC232.Wrong time,wrong place and at the very wrong-wrong-wrong
situation.
I admit nowadays,after I broke up with a guy that I feel like I have the
power and sense to be his girlfriend.Simple,actually I pitied him,
and I thought me and that guy can fall in love and have a very,good chemistry,
not suffocating me or making me like "oh,shit,I forgot,I have a boyfriend right now and it's a very burdening thing".
I feel like so,lost in space..but I have to let go of him.He's a nice guy.
Maybe b'coz my heart is still stuck with Hakim,
or my "CINTA 29 Hari"
and also I have a very,very deep crush on someone
that I missed him,erk..
I like seeing his smile upon his face,yeah3..
Complicated?
Yeah,Ouch.Meh.Deal with it.
I wish I could tell that guy,
but I don't want to..it's better for me to have a crush.
and falling in love from a distant..
I don't want him to know,
His far of my league..but guess what?
He's my friend.A very special one to me.
I'm attracted to him b'coz of him..the way he is.
I dunno,but this thing might lead to unrequited love.
fuhh..but who cares?
I'm the one who's controlling my heart and action.
As long as he's happy,I'm happy.
WTH am I saying.blargh.
Moon.Moon.Moon.
Now,I have to go.
Long live duality b'coz
that's just the way I am,peeps.=DDD


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